you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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