Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
