We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Randomize
