Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
