i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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