He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
