did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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