He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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