so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
