But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
