He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
