she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
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Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
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We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.