I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...