I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
