I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
