Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Can't talk, ducks in the car
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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