I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
