either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Im part way to drunk.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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