wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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