just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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