The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
