Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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