i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
