I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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