the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
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we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
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The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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