I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
