need another drink. this is the easiest way
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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