what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
soo... how was my night?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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