I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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