I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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