omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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