it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
