You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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