ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
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Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
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I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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