forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
