He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize