Do vagina's smell?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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