who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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