Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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