Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
