and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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