Me. At least after what I've been through.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
