Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Randomize
