i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
