i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
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Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
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jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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