Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
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Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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