i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Randomize