And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
