He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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