I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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