i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
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I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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