i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
